Where do I begin
     With the conversation
     With my sixth grade self
     With you
     With me

Do I begin with our words
     Do I begin with our actions
     Do I begin with our inactions

Do I begin with a false analogy
     An unstated metaphor

I begin with erasing what came before
     The good
     The bad

But there are no repeats
     I cannot grow you
          and me
     into us

Yet I can’t burn down the forest
     the castles
     the dungeons and labyrinths

The worlds we built together
     In a series of electrons
     In a series of wires
     Between two screens

I can’t say it was distance
     You were always close
          but we were both distant

We are a monarchy out of our time
     destined to fall
     to a future prince
     or a future princess
          who can be what we never were

I still look at you
     and I see love
     I see beauty
          but I see the cracks
          I see your flaws
          I see how you harden
          I see how you scare others away
          I see how you want others to be close
               I wanted to be there for you
               I can’t be that person, though



Tags: you and i